Exaaaaaaaams

The problem with winter break, is that is the deceptive calm before the storm.

The storm being exams.

And the rain of that storm being an endless stream of review packets.

And the lightning being those extra tests teachers like to cram in before the actual exams.

And the thunder being me banging my head against a wall.

Repeatedly.

That being said, because I've decided I haven't been neglecting posting on this blog enough, I will not be posting anything during next week's exams. This is because my head will be so crammed with information I've had to memorize that I will literally be unable to function.

In fact, I will be a veritable exam-taking zombie, risen from the dead with the sole purpose of acing a series of standardized tests.

Assuming Some Things

After taking a two week long un-announced holiday vacation from blogging, it is finally time to get back to the regular blogging schedule.

Which is to say, there is actually no schedule and that's why I sort of accidentally took an impromptu break from blogging in the first place.

Regardless, the blog is back and better than ever!

Assuming that this blog was quality to begin with.

And I like to make a lot of assumptions.

This actually gets me into a lot of embarrassing situations. I think my life is actually a situation comedy that no one told me I was participating in. Despite being uniformed, I still think I deliver the best one liners.

Right, studio audience?

Right?

Well, if there is a studio audience they are doing a really good job of hiding to fool me into thinking my life wasn't secretly a sit com, so.

Okay, I should really not blog when I'm this tired.

Ever.

Nina's Patented Study Methods

It's that time of year again when winter break is about to start so teachers cram in all the tests possible in the week before. Thus, I bring you from a state of abject despair, Nina's Patented Study Methods.

Study method #1: place your review packets on your skin in hopes that the knowledge will be absorbed through osmosis

Study method #2: lie down on the floor and cry in hopes that through sheer pitifulness you will pass the test

Study method #3: it's always C or the longest answer, right? Who needs to study?

Study method #4: watch youtube videos vaguely related to what you are studying in hopes that by the tenth LOLcat video you will have mastered the subject

Study method #5: preform the snow dance in hopes that even if you don't know the material, at least there will be no school tomorrow

Just follow these fool-proof methods and you'll be sure to maybe possibly pass if you're good at guessing the right answers to multiple choice questions!

Snow Day: Mission Success

My persuasion tactics and snow dance worked! School was cancelled yesterday and today.

I have been alternating between baking and having snowball fights. My brother and I also made a snow man that is almost as tall as I am (not a hard feat, but still).

Alas, there is most likely going to be school tomorrow. My time of freedom was too short.

I also managed to procrastinate all of my homework and push it off to wednesday, which is going to be especially painful because I will be staying late after school for a drama audition.

Life is hard.

Snow Day... Please?

It snowed!

A snow day hasn't been announced yet, but the specialty agents I've send to... persuade... whomever is responsible for scheduling snow days should be completing their work soon.

In the meantime, I've been executing my traditional Snow Day Dance, as well as wearing my pajamas inside out and sleeping with a spoon I've kept in the freezer under my pillow. Oh, and I've flushed A LOT of ice cubes down the toilet. I hope the pipes in my house survived the ordeal...

Not that I'm superstitious, but I'm pretty sure every little bit of cosmic interference helps.

R Assassination

We're back to short stories on Fridays. What a relief. The universe has finally restored its balance.

The target was in plain sight. The lapels of his coat were turned up around his face but I could still clearly identify him from this distance. I carefully aimed the rifle from my perch atop the roof of the building.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you,” said a voice behind me.

I jumped and whirled around. My hand was already reaching towards the handgun strapped to my belt.

The speaker was a boy my age. Young. He held up his hands to show that he had no weapon. “Relax,” he said,” I’m on your side.”

I didn’t relax. “How did you find me?”

He shrugged. “Easy. This is the only building that would give you a clear shot at him.” He gestured to my target, who was all ready almost out of the range of my rifle.

I narrowed my eyes. “What do you want?”

“Well, for one, I want you not to shoot who you were just about to shoot. I also want you to listen as to why.”

“I’m being paid good money for this,” I said, “You’re going to anger a lot of very important people.”

“The thing is,” the boy said, “that I am the very important people.”

“You’re R?” I asked, incredulous.

“In the flesh.”

“Then what’s the point of hiring me to kill someone and telling me not to?”

“It was a test. I wanted to see if you were capable, and you are, so now I want you to assassinate someone else.”

I didn’t believe him. He must have miscalculated who was to blame and hired me to kill the wrong person. “Then who am I supposed to assassinate?” I asked.

“Me.”

Christmas is Creeping...

So, as I briefly mentioned in my previous post, Christmas is just around the corner.

Christmas is right beside you.

Watching.

Always...

watching.

And boy am I excited! Christmas is like, the best thing ever. Because PRESENTS.

Just kidding! Christmas is really all about friendship and kindness!

But PRESENTS.

Is it too early to bust out the Pandora Christmas radio station?

...nope.

I will now write the rest of this post while listening to the dulcet tones of Frank Sinatra.

Yeah, I really like Christmas. My family does the whole decorating the tree thing and everything. Also candy canes are awesome. And PRESENTS. And snow. And Christmas music. Just Christmas.

Christmaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaas.